21 Comments
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Sonia's avatar

Oh Tessa, I'm only just catching up on your beautiful writing! I love this one. I'm in London at the moment, so it caught me at just the right time. I've been struggling to understand why I feel so heartsick here after so long away xx

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Tessa Carranza-Hawthorn's avatar

it's so hard to put a finger on those feelings, isn't it? it's a sensation that permeates everything but it's hard to hold in your hands.

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Sandy Braz's avatar

I don't even follow that show and I thought her "speech" about her life and friends was wonderful, not self-abandonment at all (what the other Substacker wrote). You get older, you don't abandon yourself, you abandon wtf held you back when you were younger and cared more about things not worth caring about.

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Tessa Carranza-Hawthorn's avatar

Amen to that!!

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Sarah Hawthorn's avatar

The best thing about collecting those memories was when you cried uncontrollably - it spoke volumes about the power of your female friendships and relationships.

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Tessa Carranza-Hawthorn's avatar

<3 it was the best

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Bella's avatar

Beautifully said xxx

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Clara Rosa Schwarz's avatar

This is such a generous and loving and realistic perspective on friendship, I was literally moved to tears. You’ve articulated some stuff I’ve been thinking about for a while. I almost felt like receiving and absolution with the knowledge that while we talk about our friends, they probably do the same when we’re not around and that’s fine. Really great piece!!

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Tessa Carranza-Hawthorn's avatar

I had to sit with that last ep for a few weeks, to work through my reaction to those women and that speech from Laurie- and this is where I landed. So happy it resonated for you

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Rachel Allcock's avatar

I’m so pleased you wrote this as you explained why I cried so much during that speech! I’ll be reading your essay to my husband to explain myself!

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Tessa Carranza-Hawthorn's avatar

I tried to explain my tears to my husband in the moment and couldn’t either! I guess that’s why I had to sit down and write this!! Xx

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Femcel's avatar

I loved this essay! I thought that speech was so human and spoke to something I hadn’t thought of. Thank you for expounding

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Tessa Carranza-Hawthorn's avatar

As I just mentioned in another comment, I def had to sit with that finale for a while to let my thoughts come to the surface. Laurie’s speech really moved soemthing in me - always worth investigating why. Right?

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Ella Sussex's avatar

Ugh I love this. Friendship is so hard, sometimes harder than romantic relationships. Repairing them when they feel broken is almost always worth it— especially with people who’ve been there since the beginning

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Tessa Carranza-Hawthorn's avatar

It really is almost always worth it, however hard it feels or however long it takes

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Elin Strong's avatar

I almost cried reading about the book your mom coordinated, too! WOW. What a gift. Literally. And so was this essay.

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Tessa Carranza-Hawthorn's avatar

I still can’t read the book without crying! Such an amazing gift

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Annabel's avatar

Beautiful, thoughtfully written piece that really resonated with me. I have shared with some special friends. Thank you Tessa.

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Tessa Carranza-Hawthorn's avatar

Thank you annabel đŸ’“

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Danni Levy's avatar

I think old friends when true friends (even when we don't see them or speak to them often) are so valuable to us bc they are proof of our childish mistakes and survival of them, our transformation, our life before it got complicated, confused, and sad. They knew us then. They know us now. And they - even when we don't see them or speak to them often) - will always be there for us, as we will always be there for them. History, love, support. Turning to old friends in good times and bad feels like going home. Love this piece. It was so enjoyable to read.

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Tessa Carranza-Hawthorn's avatar

Ouf I loved this comment so much. Before life got complicated - it tugs at the heart strings to think about it

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